I saw this post on Shonnie and Bruce's blog at their "I Do I Do" The Marriage Vow Workshop website.
Personally I find their continued wisdom around keeping your relationships fresh, open and authentic very welcome advice. Though the website is about marriage vows, their on-going insights are about your relationship - which is what really counts, right? You get married one day then the rest of your life together is your relationship. What I find all to often is the vows at the wedding are said and forgotten. The notion of actually co-creating 'relationship vows' is something I can get on board with because that is part of what helps any relationship evolve and become more loving with greater levels of gratitude being experienced. To make that work you have to talk about them and check in with each other and evolve the vows as your relationship evolves. Or maybe the vows stay as is, but the point is you talk about them periodically - and I'm not saying talk every year or two - much more often. Sure, it's scary at first, but over time it's just part of what you do to reinforce why you love each other so much.
So with that I'm reposting their recent blog entry for those of you who are married or in a relationship and you're choosing to continue down your path together to find more ways to grow together.
I miss being in a relationship - guess you could tell. I hold the vision for a new one for sure.
Best to you
Tom
--------------
Blog Post From 12-30-2007
Most people I know make New Year’s Resolutions an individual thing. If you want your marriage to be better, however, it’s best if you both resolve to make changes instead of making this a solo act. That doesn’t mean you both have to make the same resolutions. It simply means that you’re both committing to doing your part for the health of your marriage. Based on my experience, here are suggestions about two areas to consider for improvement — changes in these areas can profoundly alter your relationship for the better.
Past = resentment and grudges. 2008 = forgiveness and growth. Resolve to forgive each other for those hurtful things that we all sometimes do in our relationships. Let go of hurt feelings, talk about the pain, offer and accept apologies, then choose a new path forward.
Past = busyness and lots of “priorities.” 2008 = slowing down and reserving time for the relationship. Resolve to hold your marriage as sacred and give it the time and attention that it needs to thrive. Instead of waiting for special moments to say “I love you” or to give a gift, do things to show that any moment is a special moment in your relationship.
“Loving people live in a loving world. Hostile people live in a hostile world. Same world.”
~ Wayne Dyer
May 2008 be a truly magical year for you and your beloved. May all that did not serve you in the past be gently left behind. May those dreams which you deferred now blossom and grow in the light of a new year. May you find more joy, love, and peace in the journey to come than that which you already have known. Happy New Year!
==================================
Comments