The Parish Family Blog

Justin and Juliet Getting Married October 13th 2007

Just in case you didn't catch this in an earlier post, Justin and Juliet are getting married this coming October 13th in Austin. Let's make it official.

You'll want to check out their beautiful new wedding website at  www.justinandjulie.us - well done, Justin!

Or click on this image below!  What a happy couple.

       Tom

Update on Lost iPod and Cell Phone

Get this. A pilot for UPS has my video iPod! I'm a lucky man.  He was in the airport when someone (Thank you, whoever you are!) came up to him and said they found it in the restroom where I left it. The cell phone is still missing in action.  The man (Lee) from UPS said he had his uniform on so the person figured he was a security guy. Lee said he took it to Chicago airport security and was told they would just give it to janitors or custodians in cleaning. He said that didn't seem right because he knew it would never get to me, so he took it to his hotel and gave me a call. He apparently knew how to find my number on it.

I've deactivated the cell phone. I swear I didn't do this just so I could get an iPhone.  It is true I completely disliked the Cingular 8125 Smartphone with the Microsoft Mobile. To me it was the worst phone I've ever owned. I couldn't even get Lily to use it ...

Anyway, it's Monday morning. We're helping Mom with all the funeral home services, death certificate issues, financial issues. Yes ... this reminds me of this time last year with Sharon's passing.

What does life have in store for me next?

Tom

Sunday Evening in Marquette

Made it in finally. Very late. Lost my phone and iPod in the Chicago airport in the American Airlines area G3a. What a drag. Long story but the bottom line is they are gone for now. Doesn't look like anyone is using the phone, from watching my Cingular account. Maybe I'll get lucky. Going to call tomorrow and start the process of trying to find them.

Well, it is true I've been wanting for one of those Apple iPhones, but I was going to make that decision in a week or so.

I'm sleeping at Patti's house, in the Crow's Nest, as I call it. It's the very top floor of their home on the tallest peak in the town of Marquette, Michigan. Tom Tourville, Patti's husband, is the mayor.

The Crow's Nest is a small lookout-type room, mostly with windows. Being we are so far north I think the sun will rise around 5:30am. I so love that feeling of sunlight in the early mornings and being able to look out big windows and see for miles. It's like being in heaven, and given the passage of Sharon and now Dad, I'm sure they will know what that's really like.

Patti and Katie (niece) have pulled together two huge displays of pictures of Dad from all his years. It's a timeline that spans 76 years.  We spent some time looking it over and I was struck by how many memories came flooding back about my Dad that I had completely forgotten. Many pictures had dates and with some help from Patti I reconstructed events from when Dad was in his early 50s until now that were foggy to me. I was also reminded of how I had spent way too much time the last few years thinking about his failing health and limited interactions with us and completely forgetting about the richness of his life and how he impacted so many people around him in his career and his personal life.

I'm starting to miss Dad now - a lot.

Here are a couple of pictures of him that I grabbed before heading to bed.

with love and remembrance,
Tom

Enroute to Marquette, Michigan

It's Sunday afternoon and I'm sitting in the Chicago O'Hare airport.  As you know, I was just here week before last, making my way up to Marquette, Michigan, to visit my sister's family and Mom and Dad. We all knew Dad's condition was worsening; we just didn't reae how close he was to passing on.  It was only two days after returning to Austin that Dad died (last Tuesday). So now I'm headed back to Marquette for the memorial services and to be with the family.

I suppose it is an initiation process or some kind of rite of passage for all men when we lose our fathers. I'm taking that in.  Though I knew it was coming, I can sense I'll be giving this passage more personal time as the emotions and feelings move through me. I am left wondering about my own humanity and mortality at times, and what my legacy will be with my three kids and friends and communities.

I brought along a video camera on this trip, and last night started capturing some ideas and thoughts on tape.  I think I'll just capture what happens and see what feels right along the way.  Dad was always encouraging me to experiment - so I will.

On this final leg up to Marquette I'm going to finish remembrances of Dad and breathe in the gifts he gave me with his touch, his love and his wish for me to be all I can be in this world. Without Mom and Dad, I would not be here. I'm not talking about birth; I'm talking about their move to Houston and the connection with Dr. Denton Cooley at Texas Children's Hospital in 1959 where I was part of that first group of young kids getting open-heart surgery. In fact, the operation was on May 13th.  I've always felt like I had a second chance at life.  For this I am grateful to you Dad (and Mom) and all that you empowered me to be.

Love
Tom

Thomas H. Parish - Passes on Tuesday Morning

Early this morning I received a call from Patti, my sister, that our dad had passed on. He was not in good health these last few months, yet the reality of his being gone has more gravity than I had originally thought it would. Myself, Lily and Carolyn visited my folks in Marquette all last week, knowing this may be my last time to see Dad. I was right - he died two days after I left.

I'm returning on Sunday for the service on Tuesday then back home Wednesday.

Personally I think I'm feeling a bit numb about it.  I have a sense that more emotion will emerge over the next few days. I'm planning on attending a Shadow Work seminar in a couple of weeks here in Austin. I have had this idea in my head for months about some deep personal work I want to do around Sharon's leaving, and the grief and some anger I still find in myself. So it looks like I'll have an opportunity to deal with whatever else may be inside me with regards to Dad's leaving as well. Or, what I may be thinking now about my own mortality.

Despite all that has happened, there is much to be joyous about. Lauren is getting married to Ryan in two weeks.  Lily is going to help Lauren out beforehand in Galveston (sorta as a personally assistant) and that's such a sweet thing for me to see. Lauren sounds delighted. I'm looking forward to walking Lauren down the aisle and feeling how proud I am and remembering how proud Sharon was of Lauren, and of course my dad smiling and always saying, "Way to go, Tommy, you can do it."

With love
Tom

More To Life Program - Now Blogging!

Yep - you heard it here first!

Check out the More To Life blog at http://blog.moretolife.org

The initial voice for the blog will be Peggy Jarrett's; however, she will be inviting in blog entries from others in the organization who are working on projects. 

I'm very happy to see MTL start blogging.

So skip on over there and leave a comment! Blogging is about talking, listening and increasing our knowledge of ourselves and life through conversation.  Let's talk and learn.

Tom

PS - Sharon would be so delighted to see this happening!

Bowling in Marquette

A note on this video by Lily Parish! Yes! It's me! My very first post and my very first video, funny how those things work out so nicely.

Okay, so here's the scoop-dee-doop. As all our avid readers probably already know, Dad and Carolyn and I went up, up, up to Marquette, Michigan, where I swear they speak another completely different dialect of English. During the latter half of our wild adventure in the UP, we decided rather spontaneously to go bowling. It was the home team (Tom, Patti, and Katie) against the visiting team (Tommy, Carolyn, and Lily). The game was on!

But of course Dad, the ever-producing producer brought along the trusty (or rather MY trusty) camera, and soon it was the making of the next big blockbuster. Dad and I switched off filming between turns as we heartily beat those sorry northerners' butts! Dad and I both got three stikes in a row, but in this game, three stikes are a mighty good thing. With our freshly recorded footage, Dad and I decided to make a little video, but this time I got to edit it, MINE! It was fun, actually, learning all these weird little tricks and cuts and wiggely diddles. I surprised myself on how quick I learned it all. So here is the final product, with many last-minute touches from the Great Maestro himself. Or in my world, Dad.

Smooches!
Lily

   

I Want One of These for Father's Day

http://www.perceptivepixel.com/

Actually - we'll all be seeing more of these kinds of screens sooner than you think. It's not that far off anymore. 

Now how do I get this in my studio ??

Tom

40 Years Ago Today ... Sargent Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band

I saw this on ABC news and just felt jubilant. 1967 - we have some readers out there who remember those times, yes? I've always loved the Beatles.

Rolling Stone ranked this album No. 1 on its list of the 500 greatest albums of all time.

And 40 years later, people are still talking about the Beatles' eighth album, "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band."

Surely I have this sitting somewhere in my CD archives. I need to rip it into iTunes and listen to it next time at the gym.

Tom

Now You Are Gone

BEFORE you start watching this video let me explain.  This is a personal memorial for me to Sharon and it's just, well, something I wanted to do without a lot of editing. It's more of an emotional piece for me. The song "Now You Are Gone" is by Warren Kahn from his Beating Hearts Album. I remember Warren sending me this song last May to play at the memorial. I couldn't listen to it until almost November. I don't recall exactly why now; I just remember the song was so powerfully evoking for me I would just cry. The title, of course, adds to the impact.

I found some videos I took of Sharon and Lily making a tribe of little people. The video is somewhat shaky and grainy.  That lends a strange feel to this piece. I edited in a number of pictures that are so near and dear to me personally, that represent some of the events of the days leading up to the memorial service for my dear lady.

I end the piece with a picture of Sharon in the way I know so many people remember her. In addition to all her family and friends, Sharon deeply loved her work with the Kairos Foundation. She constantly offered herself in service with love and compassion for everyone she met throughout the world.

May the world she travels in now benefit as much as we did with her presence on this earth. I'm sure it will, with colored pens, nametags and handouts done with amazing graphics and perfect type fonts.

Goodbye, Sharon. I love you - always.
Tom