The Parish Family Blog

Nearby Hotels for Out-of-town Guests

Both of these are no-frills-type places:
Extended Stay America

(512) 231-1520 10100 N Capital of Texas Hwy Austin, TX 78759 8.5 mi N - Directions

Holiday Inn Express

(512) 891-9500 (512) 891-9570 4892 W Highway 290 Sunset Valley, TX 78735 4.7 mi SW - Directions

La Quinta Inn and Suites   (more expensive but nicer)
4424 South Mopac Expressway
Austin, TX 78735 - Map

We're only about 15 minutes from downtown where there are more hotels options.

Hope this is helpful.
Tom

Housing for Out-of-town Visitors

Hi folks,

  If you plan to come for the services and stay overnight, and you want a place to stay, please contact Stacy Ehrlich.  She is arranging in-home housing, not hotel space.

Thank you,

Jenny Meadows

Sharon Parish Sunday Viewing and Memorial Times

OK, folks, here is the final word. The times have shifted some.
So read carefully, especially if you communicated with me earlier today (Wednesday).

Sharon's Viewing
Sunday June 4th - 1pm-3pm
Cook Walden Forest Oaks Funeral Home
Google Map Link:
6300 W. William Cannon Dr.
Austin TX 78749
512-892-1172

Sharon Parish's Memorial Service
Sunday June 4th - 5pm-7pm
Austin Waldorf School
Performing Arts Center
8700 South View Rd, Austin, Texas 78737

There will be a short gathering afterward at our home
at 8708 South View Rd. (just down the street from the school).

Tom

A Letter from Dreena

This is a letter Dreena Tischler asked to be sent to Sharon's fellow trainers at www.MoretoLife.org community.  Sharon has been part of that trainer body for many years and we wanted them to know all that occurred in the last few hours. I asked Dreena if I could post this on the blog as it is so sensitive and loving and I felt appropriate for all to read. Thank you, Dreena.
---

Dear Ones:

I spent two or more hours in Gerry's (Sharon's Mom's) garden this morning amongst the lillies and "rose of Sharon" while 6 bewildered deer outside the fence stared and wondered why I didn't feed them as both Gerry and Sharon always do.  I don't know where the deer corn is!  I am sitting now at Gerry's kitchen table as rain just POURS down outside; tears from heaven; blessed rain; blessing rain.  How appropriate that on this day rain would come to end a long drought!

I want you to know that yesterday was a truly beautiful day. We had a practice run at sending Sharon off early in the day.  I had been alone with Sharon around 11:00 a.m., having talked Mom into a quick trip home to change and shower.  Sharon's vitals started declining and her breathing became very rapid and shallow; it reminded me of someone giving birth.  I just kept thinking, "How very appropriate!"  Our gentle nurse, Jean, came in and suggested I'd better make some calls and I agreed.  I called the whole (local) family back to the hospital and they got all the way there, except Paul who was farther away at our home. In the thirty minutes or so that I waited with her alone, I sang quietly to her and "blessed" her with her Warrior feather, as I have been doing twice a day or more.  No sooner did they arrive than she took a few deep breaths and every stat returned to absolutely normal.

I said, "Isn't that just like Sharon to see to every tiny detail?  She wanted to make sure the emergency alert system was working!"

I truly felt complete with her at that point, and sat very patiently with her the rest of the day, refectling on her many teachings to me. What a wonderful sister and friend and teacher and partner she was -- such a blessing.  Even in the very last moments -- which were very, very brief -- she had something to teach me and I'll talk to you about that at a better time.

What I really want you to know about those last sacred moments is that when she got ready to go -- she literally just flew away; she soared out like an eagle and it was so fast and sudden and powerful, we did not have time to telephone a soul.  So Mom and I stood -- each holding a hand -- and watched her fly away.

So as you go through this day if you feel the breeze of a wing, or the shadow of a bird high in the heavens crosses your path, know that our beloved Sharon is surely nearby, sharing on.

All my love and gratitude and blessing to you,
Dreena

Those Waiting for Sharon

This is Justin:

A few days ago Jenny Meadows told me that she has a conversation every day with her mother who died in 2001. Because her mom knew Sharon, Jenny asked if she would please be there to welcome Sharon when she arrived. In a slightly peeved tone, her mom responded, "I am already in line. <pause> And it is a long line."

Tonight, May 31, 2006, a little before 1:00 in the morning, my mother passed away. Her body finally let go and allowed her spirit to sail into the unknown. I have no idea where she is going.

I can only imagine...

... and I imagine my mother's shining spirit reaching its destination, being greeted by her dog Rosie and a plethora of friends, family, ancestors and pets who have eagerly been awaiting her arrival. She had done all she could tied to her body, and now she will continue her quest as a mystic in some place beyond our comprehension.

But for me on this planet and in this body...

...I never expected my mother to die so soon. The way in which the past two weeks have transpired has been such a mixed blessing. I have learned so much and feel much wiser than I did before this all began. Yet it all came through travelling down a bumpy and very painful road into the unknown, the death of a loved one. The truth is that I still don't understand my loss as I am still in shock and the wound is so fresh it has not yet begun to really hurt.

On Sunday, all of our family that was in town waited at the hospital to be with my mom while she passed. My uncle and I watched as the nurses quickly extubated my mom and I cried a tear of joy at the thought of her finally being set free. In the small hospital room we all gathered around my mother's body sans tubes and machinery for the first time in eleven days. There was a surge of emotion as we all watched, expecting her body to instantly give in.

We were wrong.

The day went on while family slowly went home and those of us that stayed counted the hours one by one. Soon it was Monday. Delirious and sleep-deprived, we were faced with the reality that mom's body, being as strong and healthy as it was, could carry on for weeks. All I wanted was for mom to not have to suffer any longer, to be treated as she requested and be set free to continue what she started two weeks ago. It was hard to just sit around and wait for that. The hospital staff was very accommodating and did everything in their power to help mom pass as peacefully and quickly as possible. And I am so very grateful for that.

I think the last three days have been the hardest of them all. Completely worn out, I have stepped off the roller coaster totally numb and unable to access my grief.

I have so much to say but I must go to sleep as I am exhausted and tomorrow is going to be a "BIG DAY."

I will be in touch with the details of mom's memorial and celebration.

Until then I love you all,
Justin

Sharon Takes Her Warrior Feather

Wednesday May 31 2006 at 1AM, Sharon found her way for her next journey.

She left holding her warrior feather that meant so much to her and all that know her from her contributions to the More To Life Way of a Warrior Program.

I miss you already, Sharon.

Sharon, just one more question as you leave: Have I told you lately, I love you?
I do.

Send a note to us someday. I'll look for a rainbow, new flowers in our yard, a fawn that is born and stays close to our home, a bright star. Be you and stay in touch.

Forever yours, your loving husband and family,
Tom, Justin, Lauren, Lily, Tinkerbell and Wendy

Your mom, your dad, Paul and Dreena, Juliet (with Justin), Matt and Patti, Stanley and Julie, Jenny Meadows, Ann McMaster, Peggy, Richard, Angie, Stacy and Laurie and so many many many others who have been with us for the last two weeks - relatives, the Waldorf community and the "More To Life" community.  I wish I could name them all. You know who you are around the world.

Sharon, this is the most beautiful recent picture of you, with me at the 2005 Kairos Ball in Houston. Love you always.

... and Sharon, the most recent picture of our children - Lauren, Lily and Justin remembering you for all your grace, beauty, creativity and love for us.

PS - say hi to "R-o-s-i-e girl' for us.

Details on the Sharon Parish Memorial Fund

Here are the details for the Sharon R. Parish Memorial Fund. I've received so many requests for this information so, it's time to make this available, especially now that we're going into Day 15 at the hospital.

Donation checks can be written to Thomas L. Parish, Trustee and I have the ability to endorse the deposits into this dedicated fund account. This way I'll know that you've contributed, and Lily and I can send a note of thanks to you. This is a separate bank from what I use so everything is kept separate.

Tom Parish
8708 South View Rd
Austin TX 78737

If you would prefer to remain anonymous, your gifts should be written to the Sharon R. Parish Memorial Fund at Frost Bank. Please call (512) 473-4749 in order to receive instructions on how to contribute.

Frost Bank
3525 Far West Blvd.
Austin, TX 78731

For folks perferring PayPal, you can use my email address -- tom@4webresults.com. There will be a record of what is contributed by whom so I can send a note of thanks if you use this method.

In gratitude -
Tom and Lily

14 Days

I visited Sharon tonight and talked to her about all that occurred today. Here are some notes from the day.

Some old friends came by that hadn't seen Sharon for years -- they just received the news.  I talked with Dreena and Gerry who are so loving committed to staying with Sharon until she passes on, to make sure they are ok. I'll be bringing Dreena a special Starbucks coffee in the morning as I did today.

Each time I'm up visiting Sharon I reae there is no way I could be there with Sharon and be home with Lily with such intensity. I am full of gratitude for their love for Sharon and for me so I can create some sense of regular life at home.

I'm going to look for a night gown that unbuttons in the front so we can give Sharon another bath more easily. She got her hair hand-washed again and it was so pretty. I have always loved Sharon's golden hair. It's still quite beautiful. We're trying to find the toe nail polish Sharon has on. It's beautiful and needs retouching. Everyone comments on it.

We wait until the hand of God and Sharon's spirit find a time and place to take the next move.

Justin and Paul and I all communicated today on a new level. Complying with Sharon's requests in her Living Will to be removed from life support is the most difficult thing we've ever done, especially as the wait continues.  There are so many lessons learned here.  Creating that Living Will is easy; executing it is a whole 'nother story.  It's worth speaking with someone about this to fully understand all that occurs so you know.

Today, I finally managed a decent nap this afternoon. Justin told me he did the same. I feel more rested and centered for what's to come next - whatever that may be. Life is so unpredictable.

Appreciatively
Tom

Clarification on Memorial Fund

I want to say tonight that Sharon is still with us. It seems to me she is weaker now in her breathing. Each of us gently remind her that she can let go now. We are honoring her wishes. Dreena and Gerry are with Sharon, and I think Julie will be there too soon.

I left the room and turned down the lights for Dreena and Gerry to rest their heads.  I returned home to Lily and Patti.  My sister, Patti, arrived from Michigan and I'm so happy to have her with me now.

Tomorrow begins the last week of Lily's 8th-grade class. Graduation is Friday. The dance on Saturday. She and grandma Gerry have made two beautiful dresses for the two events.

My reason for mentioning the Memorial Fund early is to alert people (there are so many reading this blog around the world) that a fund is being put in place to cover the growing hospital bills, 'future' funeral arrangements and, of course, care for Lily.  I was starting to receive a number of requests around this, and it looked like some thought it meant that Sharon had already passed.

More on this tomorrow.

Time for much-needed sleep for myself.

In gratitude
Tom

Sharon Parish Memorial Fund

To All,

We are still waiting for Sharon's safe passage. Sharon has a way of doing what she wants in her own time and we see this may take more time.  Life and its mysteries ... seems there have been many in these last 14 days, doesn't it?

Someone is holding her hand always, as we take turns waiting.

There is something I want to convey now so you know the wishes of the family.

We prefer to not receive flowers.  Instead, if you wish, we would appreciate donations to the "Sharon Parish Memorial Fund" to help cover her hospital care, the coming funeral expenses and education for Lily at Waldorf and college.

Tomorrow, I'll post the specifics of how to send any donations you may choose to send (again in lieu of flowers) right after we finae the new bank account set up specifically for this purpose. Many thanks to Stacy Ehrlich for handling this in such a timely manner and taking the load off me.

I'll have specific information for you late Tuesday morning for the Sharon Parish Memorial Fund.

Appreciatively,
Tom and the family

Tinkerbell licking Sharon upon her return from one of her trips. Yup, she misses you, babe.

The Vigil Continues

Sharon, your body is so strong and you are so beautiful even now with the graceful way you are in your bed.

We see you.

When you are ready ... when you are ready...

It's noon May 29th in Austin here at South Austin Hospital.  Angie and Flora have brought up a small feast of nourishing food for us all.  It was a very long, restless night.

Love
Tom

Sleeping Deeply

It's 12:50pm CST in Austin Texas.

Sharon is sleeping deeply and peacefully. Breathing regularly though more softly.

Our family is here by your side. We are waiting, we are talking and connecting. We are listening.

Love
Tom

A Brother's Lasting Impression

As we all sit by Sharon's bed, Paul, Sharon's brother, asked to post this:

Sharon was always evoking me.  Sharon was always calling me OUT. Sharon was alway challenging me.  Sharon was so nurturing to me. Sharon, Sharon, sweet, sweet Sharon...  I just love her so much because I just reflected the love she gave me back.  I trusted her so much because I gave her back her trust in me.  She was always so honest, nurturing, caring and warm.  At times, it was like having another mother.

She often ask me to do things I didn't think I was capable of.  But I trusted her when she told me I could do it.  She asked me to take the Life Training Weekend, so I did.  She asked me to go to WOW, so I did. She asked me to think about WOW II, that was easy...  WOW II was a blast.  I played on teams, all kinds of teams.  I did everything she asked me to.  And she was right.  It wasn't too much, and I am so grateful for having Sharon in my life. 

For me, these past 12 days have been like a new mastery class: "The 12 days of Sharon."

Paul

Hi all,

  Jenny Meadows here, a friend of Sharon's and her family's.  While the folks in the hospital room are telling "Sharon" stories, we in the waiting room -- and many of you around the world -- are too. 

  A little while ago I was talking with Robbie Gammack of Bozeman, Montana, who mentioned that she had told the following story this morning to Carolyn Baehr of New York City.  When I related it to Tom, he said it was one of Sharon's favorites and needed to be on this blog, so here goes:

  Last May, Sharon and Robbie went to Billings, Montana, to train the Mentor A Phase of People on Purpose (POP).  Toward the end of the course, Robbie mentioned to Sharon that they should do something to emphasize to the mentors the importance of being professional in their presentation.  They made a plan, and Sharon told Robbie to go ahead and start the next module without her.

  Sharon went to the restroom, rolled up her skirt to mini-skirt length, ratted her hair and pulled a shank of it into a ponytail, ladled on the makeup, put on Robbie's extra pair of glasses, and stuck a wad of gum in her mouth.  As she trotted into the room, she chirped in a high-pitched voice with a heavy accent: Ohmigawd, am I late?  Did I get here late???

Robbie, playing the "straight man" to Sharon's "gaudy floozy": Tell me about your vision for enrolling the course?

Sharon, squeaking enthusiastically:  Oh, I'm going to have 50 people!

Robbie: And how do you plan to enroll these 50 people into your course?

Sharon: Well, I don't tell people this often, but I work part-time in a bar, and there are a lot of men in there who need this course.  So I'm just going to go up to them and tell them, 'You need to take People on Purpose!' (Smack, smack.)

  As Robbie was telling the story to Carolyn this morning, she thought, I wish I had a picture of Sharon in this role.  I know someone took a picture, but I don't remember who.  I'll have to research this.  Just then, she heard her email beep, and Marrrek Pelt of Colorado had sent her the photo she wished for.  Out of the blue?  Coincidence? Robbie says she is certain that Sharon made it happen.

  Tom says, "This was the first time Sharon stepped into a role like this for herself.  She was always doing good, being kind - but not in a false way.  This role was kind of an alter ego, and she relished every bit of it. She did it all the way, as Sharon does.  She must have told that story a thousand times.  She told it on the way home, and when she got home she phoned people to tell them, and when people came over to visit, she told it again.  She so delighted in really letting herself have that experience."

Sharon Parish and Robbie Gammack

POP Mentor A Phase, Billings, MT,

May 2005

Being with Sharon as She Passes On

To All ...

How do I begin? 

So much has transpired Friday, Saturday and today. So I'll simply begin and say what comes to mind. Let me give you a short summary for now, while we wait. We found Sharon's Living Will and, after a careful review of her wishes should she be in this kind of condition, we spent hours consulting with all of her doctors before we decided to honor this beautiful soul's wishes and give her what she wants now.

I'm sitting here on the 4th floor of South Austin Hospital in Sharon's room in the intensive care unit. The same room we have been in since this began. The family is here, sitting and talking and telling stories about Sharon and ourselves.

About five hours ago we removed all the tubes and IVs, and put Sharon's most favorite nightgown on. Lily picked it out for us.  We cleaned days of tape residue from Sharon's face (the tape held the tubes in place) and carefully brushed her hair. She has a touch of makeup on and just looks so beautiful as she sleeps.  How I miss you, Sharon, as you lie there with such beauty and grace. How I will miss you tonight, as I have now for the last 12 evenings.

Each of us, in our own way today, have quitely spoken with Sharon, giving her our permissions to go home. I remember so vividly how Sharon would come to me with openess and curiosity to ask me if it would be OK if she left for trainings in New Zealand or South Africa. It meant being gone for weeks at a time. Each time I was fine with this, even when she returned from one South Africa training and then went back again within two weeks because of a deep calling to be there when no other trainer was available.

Sharon, I see you. I hear you and I release you to go now to that next training. I will wait until we meet again in the future and as always I will so enjoy sitting and listening to your stories about all the amazing people you've met and personal experiences you've enjoyed in your travels. So Sharon, even now I want to hear all about it, and I will wait until we meet again.

For now we wait patiently for this new journey to begin for you.

In love and in gratitude for all that you represent to me and so many loving people around the world wanting to know - how is Sharon.

Tom

Thursday before Memorial Day Weekend

We remain patient and hopeful. Sharon seems to be in a deep sleep and occasionally moves slightly when we are there talking. But we are not seeing any voluntary moves as yet.  She has shown a small amount of willingness to breath more on her own, but not completely yet.

Questions have been coming in regarding contributions for Sharon's hospital bills and whether we need any help for Lily to stay at Waldorf. I'm reviewing how to best set that up next week, with help from Justin and others.

We will be visiting Sharon tonight and again tomorrow.

Thank you for all the kind and wonderful notes, comments, cards, emails and prayers. Know that they are received with joy and hope for Sharon and the family.  We've received a lot of help with food locally, and what a gift that has become! I didn't reae how much work it would be to sort things like meals in times like this.

Tonight I am attending a special dinner with Sharon's mom, Gerry Tischler, to honor Nancy Campos - Lily's 8th-grade teacher. We want to be to there to express our gratitude to Nancy for the eight years of commitment, service, love and grace she's given our children.  At the Waldorf school, students get the opportunity to stay together in a single class with one teacher who carries them from Grades 1 through 8.  It's a beautiful process to watch unfold. Needless to say, this class of young souls is amazing and quite bonded emotionally and socially.

Knowing Sharon, I'm sure she would want the room filled with acknowledgment and love for all that Nancy has manifested for our cherished young ones and to let Nancy know that we will carry on with her commitment to excellence as we lead and follow our children through the next four years. That is our intention for tonight.

Tom

Sharon Tuesday May 23

Today is one week since the event. If you're like me, you're likely very anxious to hear more and want more to be happening faster. And, as Sharon would say so wisely, "It is as it is." 

A quick summary now. She is breathing herself 60% with the respirator doing 40%. All her organs are functioning well; in fact, very well. Her pupils are responsive to light. Her heart is fine. All the vitals are normal and steady. 

The issue, as I'm sure you've come to reaing yourself, is what kind of neurological damage is present as a result of the lack of oxygen during this heart (failure or event ... we're all still not exactly sure what happened and why it happened so suddenly and with no prior indications).

The problem is that Sharon has some shaking (seizure-like) in her arms and face at times. It's not on-going like it was a few days ago. It happens more when she hears us (or I assume she does) in the room.  The doctors have had her fairly heavily sedated to reduce any problems that result in these movements continuing or avalanching and getting worse.

I decided, based on input from the family and others watching her, that it was time to tell all the doctors to back off as much they are willing.  Sharon never endured medications long. In particular, she does not like those that make her drowsy.  We believed that the current level of sedation was keeping her so far down we just could not see what was really trying to emerge. So the doctor team noted my request and this morning began backing off the Ativan. I want to check about the other medications soon. The last EEG indicated no real pronounced seizure-like problems and again, due to the sedatives, he couldn't really get a reading on her brain activity. That  was the moment I thought it was time for a change, and the team agreed.

This morning we started to see some weak movement, though very jerky, then she would fall back to sleep. If a number of us were in the room talking, she got noticeably active and that brow of hers started moving.

Please accept these as simply data that might help you understand where we are. I don't believe we can make any judgments or assessments as to the severity of her injury or when she 'might' return. I don't want to create false hopes, yet I do want to find a balance of remaining hopeful.   Her condition, we believe, will remain more or less the same for many, many more days in the future and we're preparing ourselves for that ride.

This morning I asked Sharon if I could interact with her.  I sensed she agreed from a bit of movement right afterward in her eyebrow.  I then told her softly, over and over, to relax. I explained that the next medical procedure today would bring some pain and might aggravate her.  I repeated softly to breathe and relax and to move that energy she senses down her arms and down her body to her center  ---- versus holding it tight in her face and jaw and eyes and upper arms.  (I just told her the first part and in a more simplified way.) I asked her to find her center and breathe into it and then out from there. Just find any way she can to move whatever energy she's feeling through to other parts of herself. Let it pass as a wave all the way through.

So while driving home I thought of this to say to you, the reader, because I can imagine Sharon saying the same thing.

Today, find your most favorite CDs or Internet radio station that has a soothing, quieting feel to you - something very personally centering.  Be there in that special place you know to be when your eyes are closed and start riding that wave of breath as it comes in and then move out while you stay in your center.  Sense where that balance place is and we'll all synchronize with Sharon's effort to internally find a way to compensate and locate a new balance place to steady and move out from under the effects of the sedation and reawaken some of her brain.

We shall see as we be.

Love
Tom

Sharon, Lauren and Lily

"... like Aphrodite rising from the waves"

This is from David Templer in the UK. He's a friend and mentor for Sharon and me, and we've all known each other for years.  There was just something about this passage in his email, about Sharon, that really spoke to me. I want to share it with you and Sharon, wherever you are, honey.  It's the accompanying picture below that make it all so visible in my mind about Sharon's glorious soul.  I was not at the course (Sacred Path) she attended with David, yet I do recall it had a big impact on her upon her return a year or so ago.

"Attached here is my favorite Sharon picture. A group of us at Sacred Path drove down to the ocean one afternoon, and Sharon of course made intimate contact with the surf just as soon as she could. This is her climbing back up a cliff, like Aphrodite rising from the waves: the rock reflects her colouring and the sound of the ocean on the salty wind reflects her mighty spirit... "

The Waiting Game

This is Justin:

Today has been a roller coaster for me.  I am floating in a choppy lake of opinions, torn between spirituality and science.  Trying to make sense of it all and find the answers...  As I look for solutions my expected future slowly crumbles around me. 

Heart stopped.  No oxygen.  CPR?  Stroke?  Heart attack?  No, then what?  Brain injury.  WAIT!  For how long?  EKG, mitral valve leakage, EEG, hot, cold, seizures, sedatives, ICU, feeding tube, lidocaine, hypothermia, fever, ventilator, infection, pneumonia, twitch, hope, O2 levels, white light, racing heart, healthy heart, loving heart, my broken heart, love, mommy, tears, loss, the unknown...

There is so much to process right now.  It is hard to say what is going to happen, too many don't knows.  The don't knows are the bane of my current existence. 

I visit mom often and scan the machines for some sign of hope.  And at the same time I wonder if they are doing more harm than good.  This is such unfamiliar territory for me.  Whenever mom did not feel well she would go outside and sleep in the yard.  She would lay her body against the earth and let the planet's energy soothe her ailments; most of the time she woke up fine.  I long to see her lying in a soft bed of grass, free in Gaia's healing hands.

I visit mom and watch her body for some sign of life.  Today her right hand began to twitch. Is it a seizure or is she trying to communicate? Don't know.  Her left eyelid is twitching - is she trying to open her eyes so that she can see me here doing everything I can to heal her? Don't know. 

I visit mom and wait, that is all I can do right now.  Inside the waiting there have been a lot of conversations with family and friends.  Through mom's current condition our family has grown so close and 1000's of people have come together to pray for my mother.  It is so inspiring to see how accessible love is and how much support is out there for us all.  Why does it take something like this for us to access it? I don't know.

I visit mom and think that if anyone is worthy of a miracle it is Sharon Parish.  Will she miraculously recover?  Why did this happen to her? This isn't fair and it really sucks. Why? Don't know.

In the abyss of uncertainty one thing seems clear for all of us: There is a gift in this for everyone.  For me, mom's absence has given me a chance to step into really being a man.  It is as if mom has "kicked me out of the nest" and it is time for me spread my own wings and become a leader in our family; It is time for me to stop hiding behind my mom's dress, and let everyone see who I really am.  In all of this I have an opportunity to find my voice and know that it is okay to speak up for what I want and believe in.  In mom's absence I have tasted the bitterness of loss so that I can reae just how sweet and precious life is.  Mom has always been such an amazing teacher...

My simple reality has become terribly chaotic over the last 6 days, the longest of my life.  Right here, right now, amidst all the don't knows, I am finding peace in each moment by saying YES to wherever my mom is.  I have decided for myself that all I want for her is what is best, I want her to find peace...however that might look.  I miss her terribly and my heart is broken but I have no doubt that right now mom is experiencing a level of peace and joy far beyond our comprehension.  What will Sharon do?  It is up to her now and I support her 110%.  Just as she always did for me.

Will I lose hope?  No. 

Mom has always possessed the ability to make the best out of anything.  When I was a little boy, about 4 or 5, I decided that I wanted to be a vampire for Halloween.  Mom, being craft-y as she is, made me a luxurious costume, with a shiny silver vest and a black and red satin cape.  On Halloween I was in tears as I didn't want to be a mean vampire.  That did not faze mom at all; she had just the solution.  She gently bathed me, trimmed my nails, rubbed lotion on my arms, combed my hair, swapped my black gloves for white ones, put my costume on me and just like that I was a prince.  She was always able to take any tough situation and sprinkle a little of her magic on it and poof...life was suddenly so sweet.

RIght now all that we know is that we don't know what is going to be the outcome of all this.  While we wait I encourage everyone to look around and inside themselves to see what life is offering them.  How do I, you, we want to live our lives?  If you feel so inclined, find a nice spot in the grass somewhere, lie down, connect with the earth, and sit with Sharon.

After spending almost two hours with her alone tonight and talking to grandma and hearing her renewed optimism, my spirits are lifted. 

Mom did look kind of cute tonight.  Her hair was stylishly flipped off to her left side and her puffy white leg massagers, paired with the funky patterned gown, were all very reminiscent of something you might see at Burning Man.

Thank you, everyone, for being a part of my family's life and sharing your love for Sharon so openly with us. 

With love,
Justin

A Recording with Sharon and Justin

There is a MP3 attached to this blog entry. You'll need to click here and download to play it on your machine locally or transfer to your iPod or MP3 player. This is a small file and only 8 minutes long.

In March of this year Sharon was quite keen on creating some audio (podcasts) interviews. She wanted to speak with people who had previously attended the course she coordinates each year for the More To Life organization. Though Sharon is a senior trainer, she is known as "Mrs. WOW"  because every year she lead's the effort to enroll people into the 6-day Way of a Warrior training. This is the base of so many friends around the world who love her so much.

In putting this podcast together her goal was to have an honest, authentic talk about each person's experience at WOW (Way of a Warrior).   She is hopeful that this media will make it easier to convey the depth of what is taught, learned and shared at these trainings.  She is so passionate about her work and it comes through in her voice.

She recorded this herself in my studio and after a bit of help, she came back in alone and edited the conversation herself. I was amazed.  She did a spendid job, so I'm not going to adjust or refine it further. I added onlythe background music. 

For me, I just love hearing Sharon's voice, and that laugh at the end reminds me once again why I love her so.

Tom